Serenity, Courage and Wisdom

Serenity, courage, and wisdom ...

Change the things you can.

I have been struggling with a lot in my life, from deployment to an array of personal plights. Among those personal plights, and something I have blogged about previously, are negative people in my life. 

I recently battled with making a well thought out decision to rid the people in my life who were causing me sadness, stress, anxiety, or worry. A friend had said this to me which convinced me to move forward with my thoughts. 

"While those people are probably sleeping nice and snug in their beds, you are up all night struggling over them, their words, and their actions. Is it worth it?" 

She is right. The answer is, "No. No it's not." 

I can go into story about the people that have negatively affected me, from leaders of organizations that are in place to help women be supportive of each other through deployment, not tear them down, all the way to someone I had to finally let go of after a lifetime of hurt from him. There really is no point in going into detail over the reasons behind the cleansing of my soul. The only purpose it would serve is to give examples, but you know if you have negative people in your life. My examples aren't needed for you to figure that out.

I have realized that, if I am strong enough to survive deployment on my own, I am strong enough to kick the people out of my life who are making the challenges I face day to day more difficult. 

Suffice it to say this. I am not a child. I am definitely not your child. Do not speak to me like I am a child. Do not tell me how to live my life. Not only am I a woman who demands respect, I am military spouse, who deserves respect. Treat me with the dignity I deserve. My sacrifices run as deep as my husband's. If you can't do all of these things with love in your heart for myself and my family, you are welcome to leave my life forever. 

Since making my decision, and acting on it, I must say, I feel so much lighter, so much more relaxed. I am sad at losing resources I really could use during this time. I am also grieving for the loss of those that I never thought I would lose. I am still struggling with the pain of having to let go, but I no longer have to hear their sharp words, their condescending tone, and their unwanted advice. Even more so, I am no longer losing pieces of me because of them.

May you find the strength and courage to do the same.