You're My Everything

The chorus of this song is at the very end, and it's the ringtone assigned to my husband's number on my phone. The first time he had called me after several months of not hearing his voice, I couldn't even talk to him, because just hearing that ringtone come across my phone was extremely emotional. I had apologized, and said that when the phone rang, and it was his ringtone, it made me feel like life was normal again, and he was just calling me to come pick him up from work. I continue to count my blessings, because at least I heard the ringtone, and his voice. I know he is safe.

How to Fake It

I have always had a hard time showing my emotions in front of people. Crying, not an option. Anything but a smile, not an option. I am not sure why or how I have come to believe this, other than, I was taught at a fairly young age that I better not show weakness, and crying, of course, is a sign of weakness (at least in my opinion).

I had gone to a Scentsy party hosted by one of the wives from the sub. I didn't really want to go, truth be told, because I have been feeling like I just want to be alone with my "weakness." Turns out the party was exactly what I needed, and I met some wonderfully funny ladies.

One comment, however, stood out more than most. The comment was made after I had said that I have a hard time showing my emotions in front of people. One lady piped up and promised this. "We will break you." I almost gave in right then and there.

After a lifetime of the same habit, I do believe this woman will eventually be right. This life is hard. I am not sure I like who it's turning me into, but time will tell. I am sure I will grow in some ways, and in other ways, I will digress. Life has a funny way of balancing itself out like that, and I feel as if that balance is well on it's way.

I know I am not making much sense, but future blogs will show clarity.

Happy Father's Day, my Chris. I love you.

One Step at a Time
by Joseph Morris

In the morning with the journey all before us on the road,
It takes courage to begin, that is sure;
For the first step is the hardest, and we always think the load
May be greater than we've power to endure.
When the first mile lies behind us we can say, "Now that is done,
And the second and the third will soon be past."
So we trudge on through the noontime, and the setting of the sun
Finds us coming to our stopping-place at last.

When a man would climb a mountain he's appalled to see the length
Of the slope that reaches up into the sky;
But he starts, and with the climbing he will find he's gained the strength
To attain the very top, however high.
For the climbing of a mountain takes but one step at a time--
Who has courage to do that will reach the goal;
He will stand upon Life's summit and will know that joy sublime

Which is his alone who dares to prove his soul.